Souvenirs

It was inevitable that we came to this point. It seems so cliche to be at the end of high school, and want nothing more than to go back. My future looms in front of me everyday, yet all I want to do is return to the faces of the past. They are familiar, friendly, safe. And, of course, I know that there is nothing to be done about it. I'm moving on now, every person does. My position is not special, I am not experiencing anything that is not common to mankind, yet still my heart aches for the days that will never come again. The days with all of my people, all of my friends, all gathered in one building, day after day, basketball game after basketball game, youth group after youth group. I am so excited to move on in my life, to meet new friends, to break new ground, but right now I feel like a lone survivor of a time that has passed. I feel like a relic of a bygone era. It's difficult to process, and of course I am romanticizing, as all people do. But perhaps romanticizing isn't such a problem when the times really were beautiful. I failed a lot in high school. I didn't always give the effort I should have, I didn't always befriend everyone I could, I didn't always stand up for what I knew was right, but for all of my failures, God blessed the past four years of my life. He gave me a sphere of influence to thrive in, a group of people who care about me, and a family that has always stood by me. For all of the difficult times, God stood by, ever present, ever my rock. I was able to lead, a privilege I pray I never forget. I was able to love my peers, my friends, not just in my class, but all over. I was inspired by acts of perseverance and emotional strength, I was witness to great displays of God's power and poignant moments of praise. I fought through stress, fatigue, drama, and yet, when I stand at the other side, I just want to go back. To see the faces, all togehter, for one last time. To walk down the halls, acknowledging the fact that I was blessed to do life day-by-day with one hundred of my best friends. These are the things I'll take with me as I move forward. The daily grind fades away, the pain never seems to leave a mark. What I'll remeber is the laughter. The times of unity. The come from behind victories. The worship around a campfire. The hot tubs. The flailing arms in a makeshift moshpit. The awkward freshmen years that led to even more awkward sophomore years. Talking about girls till the wee hours of the morning. Telling really bad jokes. And how, through all of it, God was molding me into the man he wants me to be. It all happened in the blink of an eye, but at least I'll always have these souvenirs to hold on to.

Here's to the twilight
Here's to the memories
These are my souvenirs
My mental pictures of everything
Here's to the late nights
Here's to the firelight
These are my souvenirs
My souvenirs

I close my eyes and go back in time
I can see you're smiling, you're so alive
We were so young, we had no fear
We were so young, we had no idea
That life was just happening
Life was just happening
I wouldn't trade it for anything
-Switchfoot