Shouting

I like to pretend that my life is pretty good. Even in my deepest lie, I'd never say it's perfect, but my life is full of shrugs and "oh wells" when I'm really hurting inside. And this is not to say that my life is horrible, because it's truly not. I have a loving family, caring friends, free country and most importantly, an all forgiving Savior. But what I am saying is that when trials come, I don't heed them. I pretend like I don't have problems rather then face them head on. Instead of embracing my support base, I'm inclined to keep those loving people in the dark. When life starts getting harder, scarier, more real, that's when I turn up the volume, force a harder laugh, yell a little louder. I try to drown out the fear, the pain and the reality. Optimism is one thing, negligence and ignorance are another. I'm neglecting my God given commission to be a part of community. This Christmas, I am reminded to keep the volume low, quiet my heart and remember that the King didn't come with a shout or scream, but on a silent night in  town of farmers. If I want to hear His voice, I need to be still and know that He is God. Comfort, peace and joy come from rest in God's Love. It is more than my fear, more than my pain. It's more than anything that could ever stand against me. I thank God for His goodness in 2015 and His continued goodness in the rest of my life.